Stepping out of the comfort zone or the beginning of an electrifying adventure

For years, I have found myself struggling
with starting a blog ? candid, blunt, and unpredictable  ? simply the virtual soul of my corporeal
body. My thoughts have been running wild, spinning rapidly in my brain, causing
habitual headaches and itchiness down my spine. The questions and answers I
have continuously kept within myself have unlocked a weird sleeping disorder. Insomnia? Nah?

Imagine that:

11 PM, just finishing off your pampering
routine ? removing the foundation mask that has concealed your skin?s
imperfections and moisturizing it excessively to eliminate any signs of
fatigue. You put on your blindfold to ensure that no moon rays will find their
way through the curtains to your tired eyes. And you fall asleep just a second
after you lay your head on the pillow.

Dreams - vivid and deep. Dreams so realistic making it impossible to differentiate between them and the world you are
inhibiting.

8AM ? Alarm. Snooze? Snooze? Snooze. At 9 AM you open your eyes ? dizzy and confused. Surely you were meant to be at
work by 9. Eyelids falling heavily on your eyeballs making you question whether
you?ve been partying the night before instead of cozily cuddling under the
duvet. And then the ultimate headache?and the never-ending doubt  ? was I dreaming or am I dreaming now. The
next 10 hours pass painfully and slowly. Tick ? tack. You feel more tired than
you had before you went to bed, exhaustion shouting loudly in your ear luring
you back to your flat. Too bad you are at work, attending a meeting so important
that you have to force yourself to stay awake and answer all the questions posed
by your clients.

A few months ago it suddenly hit me ? I have somehow
developed hypersomnia. At first I
couldn?t figure out why until I got a glimpse of myself in the mirror. There
was no trace of the cheerfully grinning girl that everyone knew. Having always
been regarded as ?social butterfly? I suddenly noticed that the butterfly has
flied away. My face looked somehow tired, expressionless ? with eyes lacking
their usual spark and lips curved in a downward direction. Today thinking about
last year I realise that I had forced myself to a job, which was making me
anything but happy. Staying at an office for 12 hours and communicating only
with Word and Excel was not really my passion. I craved to be able to walk
outside, to incessantly communicate, to reflect on what I?ve previously read.
To give myself some privacy I?d even developed the habit of listening music so
loudly that the tunes were not only piercing my ears but also filling up the
air around me. Yes, music was my ultimate savior. The headphones enabled me to
hear my thoughts and distract myself from the dull atmosphere.

Please, don?t get me wrong ? I?m grateful for
the opportunity I got to expand my knowledge by learning things I had never
imagined I would before. But surely what I feel most grateful about is that I
finally came to the striking realization that no achievements can make up for
the time you have lost in doing something you simply don?t enjoy. And although
I hate disappointing people and leaving bad impressions it was time for me to
get myself together and quit work. My happiness was at stake and I had to be bold.

I remember it was Sunday when I went to the
hairdresser? She saw me and immediately grinned, ?I love your make up!? Make
up? I had only some mascara on. I tried to explain that I wasn?t wearing
anything but she insisted ?but your eyes? they look somehow different! It
should be the make up?? Well no. And then I smiled - the following day was going
to be my last day at the office. Freedom was what my eyes were hinting; relief
that in a few hours time I?d feel free, happy, and most importantly myself
again. 

But the question remained ? I quit work ? now
what?

And Voilà!

My friends have been constantly seeking my advice,
which I have offered via e-mail (when in the office) or over a coffee. I cannot
even visualize the countless times when I was typing long motivational messages
with the intention of helping family and friends.

Until A. posed to me THE question?

Why don?t you start a blog in which you can help others to cope
with their anxieties? You?ve been there. You?ve struggled before. You?ve been
through a lot?and yet you?ve somehow managed to find the light at the end of
the tunnel ? why don?t you guide others to the exit it too?

Well, I needed a wakeup call to initiate such
a project. And I was all in for it.
I was ready to get out of my comfort zone.

Having said that I?d like to welcome you to
Letters to Antoinette. Rather than a ?lifestyle blog? I?d like to regard it as
the blog that you and I will create together.

Though you will be reading my daily posts
about life, style, fitness, and travel, I?d be here, just on the other side of
your screen, anticipating your letters ready to assist you in finding the
answer to your questions about love, friendship, and lifestyle.

And you probably wonder ? why her? Is she
credible at all?  

I?m not a psychologist; in fact I have a
degree in Communication and Media Studies. However, I?m a human being ? just like
you. And weirdly enough, with time I have realized that life cannot be learned
from books. Life is what is happening to you just now. Yes, even while you are
reading this post. J

Life is made up of assorted experiences. It
is made up by a doze of cheerful laughter, a pinch of scalding tears, a touch
of strong relationships, spiced up with moments of risk-taking and doubt - everything.
And what I?ve seen and experienced, what I have witnessed and what I?ve been
told ? well, it has all helped me develop critical understanding of life.

I hope you?ll enjoy reading my Daily Posts
through which I will be unveiling bits and pieces of my lifestyle and
challenging life encounters ? some of which quite amusing while others rather
sad. 

For the other part, and shall I say, the most
essential part of this blog, I?d be counting on you to let me in your private
world and allow me to assist you in dealing with your struggles regarding love,
friendships, personal style, dieting ? you name it.

I?m quite positive that we?ll have great time
together? and probably share the occasional tear. But as I said that?s what
life is about.

And until you feel confident enough to also share
your story I hope you?ll enjoy mine.

Lots of love and positive thoughts,