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DATING ADVICE: LTA’S FIRST DATE SURVIVAL GUIDE
DATING ADVICE: LTA?S FIRST DATE SURVIVAL GUIDE
And here we are. 105 posts later and finally discussing what we should have spoken about quite some time ago ? first date dos and don?ts. Initially, I though of separating the article into two parts & target each gender. But the thing is ? no matter whether a boy or a girl, when it comes to dating, it?s always quite subjective what?s right and wrong and how you should behave in order for a second one to follow.
So, if you?re still quite uncertain what to do on a first date that?s an article for you!
First date outfits:
Okay, no matter how superficial it might be for some, paying attention to what you wear on a first date is purely essential if you wanna make a great first impression. And first impressions while incredibly quickly to form, are overly slow to change! Just remember that there is a fine line between dressing up neatly and nicely and going to the other extreme of trying way too hard and pulling off an over-the-top outfit that?s a) uncomfortable to wear and b) not appropriate for the place to which you?re headed.
Okay, no matter how superficial it might be for some, paying attention to what you wear on a first date is purely essential if you wanna make a great first impression. And first impressions while incredibly quickly to form, are overly slow to change! Just remember that there is a fine line between dressing up neatly and nicely and going to the other extreme of trying way too hard and pulling off an over-the-top outfit that?s a) uncomfortable to wear and b) not appropriate for the place to which you?re headed.
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My advice? Go for an outfit that feels like a second skin rather than for something edgy that will make you feel completely out of place. Actually, is it just me that every time I choose to wear something trendy, though not really corresponding to my style, I just cannot behave naturally and cool as I otherwise would!?
Aw, and ladies, please cover up that cleavage of yours!!! Be mysterious and show some class! And if you?re going for a dress, keep it C-H-I-C, choosing a mid-length pencil or skater skirt. Actually, on a first date I?d normally wear a pair of slim fit jeans, a simple white top, finishing it off with a tailored blazer, an oversized necklace and pair of pumps that are COMFY enough to walk in! Even though tripping over in front of your date (on your first date!) might be kind of cute, I?m pretty sure in reality that?s the last thing you wanna happen. Also, restrain yourself from wearing ?girlfriend? type of clothes ? scratch the harlem pants, baggy/boyfriend type of jeans unless you?re headed to a dance class. In this case - the previously mentioned are allowed.
And guys, I think we are on the same page on that one!
Meeting up with someone who wears tons of make up is certainly not the most attractive thing. And girl, please, don?t stare in confusion! Just think about it - the fact that he?s
already invited you on a date means that he already likes you enough, right? And
anyway, even if he ends up not liking you for ?wearing? your ?natural self?,
then you should probably reassess whether you should be up for a second date, right? And that?s the thing ? the more natural you are, the more likely
it is that he?ll fall for the your ?real? rather than ?dolled up? self?!
Now pay attention,
boys! When you make up your mind where you wanna take your date to, please
let her know if she has to wear something specific. The last thing you want is taking her to a muddy park with her rocking a pair of pretty expensive
Jimmy Choos, right?
boys! When you make up your mind where you wanna take your date to, please
let her know if she has to wear something specific. The last thing you want is taking her to a muddy park with her rocking a pair of pretty expensive
Jimmy Choos, right?
And what about your
outfit you wonder? Personally, I?ve always found it incredibly attractive and
cute when a guy makes effort prior to our date. No matter what your style is: always
iron your clothes, polish your shoes /the first thing I?d actually notice/ and
wear some nice fragrance! Aw and the hair!
Just don?t forget to do something with it! Anything. Thanks.
outfit you wonder? Personally, I?ve always found it incredibly attractive and
cute when a guy makes effort prior to our date. No matter what your style is: always
iron your clothes, polish your shoes /the first thing I?d actually notice/ and
wear some nice fragrance! Aw and the hair!
Just don?t forget to do something with it! Anything. Thanks.
Where to go on a
first date? If I have to rate my first dates, I really don?t think I?d ever
mention one that?s taken place in a posh restaurant. Going for the casual has
always worked better for me. There?s insane pressure whether it will all gone
as well as you’ve imagined ? so the more relaxed the atmosphere-the better! Go
for after-work drinks, walk your pets, visit some quirky exhibition that you
could later on discuss over a coffee. Do something chilled that could also
bring up some interesting conversation topics for your first date conversation. And if you
decide that you still wanna go to a restaurant ? make sure to find out whether
your date has specific food preferences. Taking
a vegetarian to a steak house wouldn?t be ideal, would it?
first date? If I have to rate my first dates, I really don?t think I?d ever
mention one that?s taken place in a posh restaurant. Going for the casual has
always worked better for me. There?s insane pressure whether it will all gone
as well as you’ve imagined ? so the more relaxed the atmosphere-the better! Go
for after-work drinks, walk your pets, visit some quirky exhibition that you
could later on discuss over a coffee. Do something chilled that could also
bring up some interesting conversation topics for your first date conversation. And if you
decide that you still wanna go to a restaurant ? make sure to find out whether
your date has specific food preferences. Taking
a vegetarian to a steak house wouldn?t be ideal, would it?
The importance of
being on time! No matter whether you are a boy or a girl ? being on time is
PURELY ESSENTIAL, especially if you wanna leave a lasting and POSITIVE first
impression. Just remember: being fashionably late is no longer trendy and if
anything?s pretty annoying. And if you end up running late ? make sure to drop
your date a text and apologise.
being on time! No matter whether you are a boy or a girl ? being on time is
PURELY ESSENTIAL, especially if you wanna leave a lasting and POSITIVE first
impression. Just remember: being fashionably late is no longer trendy and if
anything?s pretty annoying. And if you end up running late ? make sure to drop
your date a text and apologise.
Now please pay close
attention. Very close.
attention. Very close.
With all social media on board, stalking people has been
slowly turning from quite abnormal and socially unacceptable to quite a mundane
daily activity. /Stop rolling you eyes and pretend to be surprised.
Occasionally going through your ex?s facebook page (through your best friend?s
account) also counts as stalking! Not that it?s no longer creepy, but, hey,
sometimes you just can’t resist the temptation to have a peek at someone?s
profile. And while it?s absolutely okay to admit in front of yourself digging though your date?s
photo archives and doing a cheeky Google research on them, letting them find out?s definitely NOT. Randomly dropping into the conversation
facts that you?ve gathered from their Facebook profile could just scare them
away and make them vanish in no time, murmuring some lame excuses for why
they?ve decided to leave. Just keep all the information to yourself until the other
fills you in on all the details and just to be safe just get off their profile already!!!
slowly turning from quite abnormal and socially unacceptable to quite a mundane
daily activity. /Stop rolling you eyes and pretend to be surprised.
Occasionally going through your ex?s facebook page (through your best friend?s
account) also counts as stalking! Not that it?s no longer creepy, but, hey,
sometimes you just can’t resist the temptation to have a peek at someone?s
profile. And while it?s absolutely okay to admit in front of yourself digging though your date?s
photo archives and doing a cheeky Google research on them, letting them find out?s definitely NOT. Randomly dropping into the conversation
facts that you?ve gathered from their Facebook profile could just scare them
away and make them vanish in no time, murmuring some lame excuses for why
they?ve decided to leave. Just keep all the information to yourself until the other
fills you in on all the details and just to be safe just get off their profile already!!!
Time to feed
yourself!
yourself!
First, stock on gums and keep reminding yourself that
ordering anything that contains fresh onion and garlic is not the wisest idea!
Having garlicky/onion breath won?t get anyone kiss you, just so you know. And boys, keep that in mind as burgers contain fresh onion too! Okaaaay, that?s an awkward one ? if you have teeth like mine ? you might end up with a piece of celery getting stuck between them. Just imagine the other one casually throwing into the conversation ?Hey, you?ve got something on your front tooth. No, no, the other one?. And that?s the best-case scenario. The worst is being completely oblivious to why they are staring at your mouth while you?re grinning. And then you end up going to the loo to only find out the bleak and utterly embarrassing truth! Aw, and girls ? EAT! There is nothing worse than picking at your beetroot salad while your date is demolishing a three-course meal. I?m pretty sure you?ll hardly ever find a guy who finds any anorexic behaviour appealing. And guys! The napkin?s there for a reason ? use it! Use the knife to cut your food. You?re not pigging on a slice of Dominos while playing Fifa, okay? And while you don’t have to act like Prince Charming, being a gentlemen is certainly encouraged! Help her out with the chair, open the taxi door, give her the chance to order first.
ordering anything that contains fresh onion and garlic is not the wisest idea!
Having garlicky/onion breath won?t get anyone kiss you, just so you know. And boys, keep that in mind as burgers contain fresh onion too! Okaaaay, that?s an awkward one ? if you have teeth like mine ? you might end up with a piece of celery getting stuck between them. Just imagine the other one casually throwing into the conversation ?Hey, you?ve got something on your front tooth. No, no, the other one?. And that?s the best-case scenario. The worst is being completely oblivious to why they are staring at your mouth while you?re grinning. And then you end up going to the loo to only find out the bleak and utterly embarrassing truth! Aw, and girls ? EAT! There is nothing worse than picking at your beetroot salad while your date is demolishing a three-course meal. I?m pretty sure you?ll hardly ever find a guy who finds any anorexic behaviour appealing. And guys! The napkin?s there for a reason ? use it! Use the knife to cut your food. You?re not pigging on a slice of Dominos while playing Fifa, okay? And while you don’t have to act like Prince Charming, being a gentlemen is certainly encouraged! Help her out with the chair, open the taxi door, give her the chance to order first.
A drink to make yourself relax?
That’s a tricky one!The fact
that you?re on a first date means that you?re attracted to your date, right? So you’re probably also a bit nervous whether everything would go down as
anticipated. And while having quite a few drinks (to make yourself calm down)
might seem as a pretty great idea at the time, getting off your face is
definitely NOT! Also, when the nerves hit you, you might not be able to handle
your drink as well as you normally would. Be smart and have a glass or wine or
order a light cocktail. Any extreme drinking behavior is just not on. Not to mention that when drunk you might consider some inappropriate for first dates behaviour as quite acceptable.. so, just watch your drink, okay?
that you?re on a first date means that you?re attracted to your date, right? So you’re probably also a bit nervous whether everything would go down as
anticipated. And while having quite a few drinks (to make yourself calm down)
might seem as a pretty great idea at the time, getting off your face is
definitely NOT! Also, when the nerves hit you, you might not be able to handle
your drink as well as you normally would. Be smart and have a glass or wine or
order a light cocktail. Any extreme drinking behavior is just not on. Not to mention that when drunk you might consider some inappropriate for first dates behaviour as quite acceptable.. so, just watch your drink, okay?
First date conversations:
The best accessory for a first date? A genuine smile and a positive
attitude. So, open up and be willing to talk. However, while you should definitely
create the impression that you feel comfortable and relaxed in their company,
restrain yourself at all times from crossing the line and getting way too
personal. Your date is a) not your therapist and b) you?re not Freud either, so
stop analyzing and making comments on everything they say! Choose lighter
topics for your conversation (which EXCLUDES politics, religion, gender issues,
aw and LGBT) and ask questions that do not hint how desperate you are to be in
an exclusive relationship. And while it?s absolutely fine asking why they?ve
chosen to do whatever they?re doing for a living, just forget about asking how
much money they earn. Also, while it?s all-okay to ask in which part of the
city they live, querying them on the number of children they wanna have should
be postponed for later. Later like when you?re officially in a relationship. If
get there at all.
attitude. So, open up and be willing to talk. However, while you should definitely
create the impression that you feel comfortable and relaxed in their company,
restrain yourself at all times from crossing the line and getting way too
personal. Your date is a) not your therapist and b) you?re not Freud either, so
stop analyzing and making comments on everything they say! Choose lighter
topics for your conversation (which EXCLUDES politics, religion, gender issues,
aw and LGBT) and ask questions that do not hint how desperate you are to be in
an exclusive relationship. And while it?s absolutely fine asking why they?ve
chosen to do whatever they?re doing for a living, just forget about asking how
much money they earn. Also, while it?s all-okay to ask in which part of the
city they live, querying them on the number of children they wanna have should
be postponed for later. Later like when you?re officially in a relationship. If
get there at all.
AND PLEASE avoid taboo topics regarding anyone’s height/weight! Even
if they don?t have any issues discussing them, the chances are pretty high that
someone gets offended. Just keep the jokes for your pals, okay?
if they don?t have any issues discussing them, the chances are pretty high that
someone gets offended. Just keep the jokes for your pals, okay?
And just remember ? no matter whatever you end up talking
about ? try not to pretend being someone you?re not. He?s talking about a
film you haven?t seen, maybe you should watch it first and then share your
thoughts, rather than nod in approval. And using
difficult words to impress someone just because they?re a lawyer, might play
you a bad joke, especially if you don?t use them in the appropriate way.
about ? try not to pretend being someone you?re not. He?s talking about a
film you haven?t seen, maybe you should watch it first and then share your
thoughts, rather than nod in approval. And using
difficult words to impress someone just because they?re a lawyer, might play
you a bad joke, especially if you don?t use them in the appropriate way.
Stay present and keep
your phone away!
And put it on SILENCE! Even if you feel the urge to text your buddies and fill them in on how everything?s going, it?s kind of inappropriate to do so right in the middle of the your date?s sentence. Be respectful and try to engage in the conversation, while avoiding three syllables S-(E-X!)!! No matter whether you?re a boy or a girl, talking about your previous sexual encounters and fetishes is just not what you
do. Aw, and keep hypothetical questions like ?It?s so not okay to ditch your
girlfriend minutes before attending her sister?s wedding? off the table!! Just
any inferences about your previous intimate relationships should just be kept
away.
your phone away!
And put it on SILENCE! Even if you feel the urge to text your buddies and fill them in on how everything?s going, it?s kind of inappropriate to do so right in the middle of the your date?s sentence. Be respectful and try to engage in the conversation, while avoiding three syllables S-(E-X!)!! No matter whether you?re a boy or a girl, talking about your previous sexual encounters and fetishes is just not what you
do. Aw, and keep hypothetical questions like ?It?s so not okay to ditch your
girlfriend minutes before attending her sister?s wedding? off the table!! Just
any inferences about your previous intimate relationships should just be kept
away.
The copy-cat technique or how to boost the chemistry between you (here)
That?s a simple psychological trick ? smile if they smile,
if they show affections, show some back. This creates the impression that you
are on the same page and will make you feel more comfortable with one another.
Of course, keep everything within reasonable limit if you don?t want to end up
acting like a complete weirdo. It?s all about being subtle! Just let the magic
naturally unfold without forcing anything at all. Aw, and about the complements?
Make a complement or two and restrain yourself from making complements every other
second. Actually, I?m quite bad with taking complements;
I can handle one or two, but a wave of complement just makes me cringe.
if they show affections, show some back. This creates the impression that you
are on the same page and will make you feel more comfortable with one another.
Of course, keep everything within reasonable limit if you don?t want to end up
acting like a complete weirdo. It?s all about being subtle! Just let the magic
naturally unfold without forcing anything at all. Aw, and about the complements?
Make a complement or two and restrain yourself from making complements every other
second. Actually, I?m quite bad with taking complements;
I can handle one or two, but a wave of complement just makes me cringe.
The check arrives. Now what!
Awww, the awkward moment of who?s paying the check. Right, we live in the 21st century and while women are much more independent in regards to their finances, in reality we do appreciate when the guy takes care of the check at least on the first date. However, girls, always offer to contribute and if your offer?s turned down, I suggest you get the next round of drinks, or pay for the cinema tickets. And if you’re the one who’s invited the guy, then you’re the one who’s paying.
Should you kiss on first date?
Well, I?ve been on so many first dates that today if I?m to go on one, by the end of it I?d know if there should be a kiss. My advice ? if by the end of the date you still feel uncomfortable and awkward and all you think about is getting home and indulging in some Ben And Jerry?s ? then just call it all a day and do that. And I don?t believe in wait until the 3rd time you see each other to kiss. If a chemistry exist, it will all naturally take place without you having to wonder. And at the end of the day it?s not about seizing the moment, it?s about letting it seize you, right?
Okay, the date is all over now what?
A follow up text or a call is absolutely fine as long as you don?t sound overexcited and crazy! I?m not asking you to play any games! Just try to act cool, rather than desperate. Thumbs up for the ?Had a great time. Thanks again.? and so not for the ?GOSH IT WAS absolutely AMAZE!!!! Can?t wait to see you!!! We should so do a brunch with my sister!?
While you can definitely learn quite a lot on a first date and ask some personal questions, just be cool and wait for the second one to get more personal and find out whether you?re on the same ‘relationship’ page. And the most important thing I’ve learned - it’s all about being as natural as you possibly could! Letting the other one get to know who you really are is surely the best way of finding out whether there’s any potential for this to continue in the future at all.
Have you had any awkward moments on a first date? And do you have any additional tips for how to handle yourself on a first date? Can’t wait to hear your thoughts.
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