A Letter to Sofia’s 16-Year-Old Self
No you weren’t upset that day, despite that little grumpy face. You were just responding to the change of your surroundings. Was it the fact that the flat felt bigger (with the furniture getting fewer), or was it the way your dad and I behaved?
I asked your dad to freeze the moment with a photo of us two. Our last photo in our first home! Your first home!
Now you are no longer that baby girl fully dependent on us (though you’re still OUR baby). You are on the verge of becoming an adult and I thought to drop you a line to then put in a time capsule.
You have probably wondered why we took the decision to move from Denmark when you were only 7 months… and the odds are that now we live neither in Copenhagen nor in Sofia.
The day we decided to move was the day we started on crafting the biggest gift you were to one day receive.
In 2017 I was yet to experience parenthood in its purest sense. And what I was quite anxious about was giving you ‘the right advice’ about things I’ve never tried.
Around the time we took that photo we daydreamed which profession you were to choose one day. Were you gonna do something artistic or become a genius in math?
A calling. I guess we call it that way because often we are too busy paying attention to the advice of everyone around that we fail to hear the phone that rings in our heart. And if we chose to be a notch more aware, we would pick up the phone and hear the voice of our truest self.
I was on another line once. And so was your dad.
I was moving from one country to another, hoping to find my place under the sky, completely oblivious to the fact that it wasn’t the place that mattered, but what was taking place in my heart.
Prior to our move your dad had chosen to embark on an already made path by his dad. He had no time to dream big. He was way too busy making money to sit and reflect on how he truly felt.
We both ended up justifying our heavy heart with ‘it is what it is’… we had you in our arms and were determined to give you the world. Only that we’d formulated our goal and means to achieved in a wrong way.
Making sure that you have great opportunities in life wasn’t enough. You deserved more. You deserve more.
We were going through a rough patch and as much as we were trying to repress our emotions, they eventually came out. It was all or nothing.
We went all in.
We chose to go through the woods and pave our own path.
It was time that we said ‘SH!’ and tuned into the right station.
We owned it to ourselves as human beings and to you as our daughter.
You might feel that life gets the best of your from time to time – and believe it or not I’ve also been there – a teenager slamming the doors and daydreaming about the day I was gonna be unleashed.
Life happens and rolls on.
And the truth is – you can’t stop it…or slow down its course. You have no control over that. What you do have control over is how you choose to spend your days, whom you spend them with, and what on.
We didn’t REALLY decide to MOVE.
We just chose to GET GOING.
Get going with our lives and setting up the right example for you.
We couldn’t afford to be HYPOCRITES – to end up talking about ‘freedom’ and motivating you to pursue your dreams if we were never bold enough to do that ourselves.
But we did it. And, yes, Sofia, you can craft your life exactly as you please. In 2017 we kissed out first home goodbye, we sold everything, and left.
And for what it’s worth, we were damn happy to do it. Because we were also packing the gift that you are receiving today.
Spread your wings and grab your life by the horns.
Only YOU can conquer it!